Home' Afloat : AFLOAT November 2016 Contents Take monthly with water November 2016 7
Letter of the month
The Editor ’s choice for letter of the month will
receive a 28" Yachtsman’s Waterproof Bag.
Made from tough double
coated PVC fabric with
seams sewn and tape
welded the Burke bag is
This month’s prize goes to
from Cremorne Point, NSW.
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TasPorts tug to the rescue in floods
Thankfully the only operational tug on the Mersey River,
Tasmania did leave its berth at the height of the June floods or
I may have washed up on Egg Island on the April Rose. (‘Floods’
by Malcolm Riley, Afloat Oct ’16).
I, along with a mate, took refuge on this boat as the outer
pontoon of the Mersey Yacht club was cut off when the link
bridge finally broke away. The crew manning the yacht club rescue
boat bravely tried to get us off but due to the instability of the
pontoons and the amount of debris in the river this was aborted.
The YouTube link mentioned in Malcolm Riley’s article shows
what happened next.
What most of the public have not seen or heard of is that
because there was the real risk of personal injury the port tug
left its berth. I was eventually plucked off the April Rose about
1nm from the river mouth, in the dark.
My friend, who during the carnage wound up on the Challenge,
was able to be rescued by the club rescue boat in the river as it
had broken away from the pontoons.
Rations have been short this year. What meat I have been able
to acquire has certainly been to the West Indies several times
and could only be attacked with a large fid and sharp chisel.
Nevertheless, you can be assured that my most recent dose
of fresh protein died of causes natural. Having laid claim, in
the traditional way, to much of my deck on Supertramp II, it was
only natural that I would take a swipe at the nesting seagull as
it attempted to repel my boarding.
Much to my chagrin and indeed to my utter surprise, I managed
to connect with this poor creature, purely in self-defence, and
despite all attempts at revival at the local veterinarian, with no
expense spared, life expired. Yes, while accidental, I took the life
of one of Neptune’s creatures.
Given the lack of protein in my diet and a desire to see the
poor bird’s demise amount to more than naught, I decided to
pluck, gut, cook and eat it. As many may have surmised, once the
gut is removed, there remains very little in the way of substance
to a seagull. Baked in a small pie it did present as, at least, a
dainty little appetiser.
Following this exercise, experiment if you like, I have several
findings to report, they are of a most sensitive nature and I
felt it best to announce these discoveries to your responsible
readership, before news emerges on some of the less reliable
Heading my report of news on the culinary front is that
seagull, and I know some may find this hard to believe, tastes like
chocolate, it is absolutely delicious, better even than whale meat.
We come now to a slightly more sensitive subject, involving
male physiology and again, I am relying on your readers to treat
this subject with due decorum. One hesitates to explore the
matter in any great detail, suffice to say, that seagull has what
one can only describe as a most overwhelming restorative effect.
This impact was remarked upon, by various personal
acquaintances, no less than a dozen times within just a few hours
my ingesting that poor, chocolate-flavoured, airborne defecator.
My concern of course is that should my acquaintances publicly
remark on the effects of ingesting just one seagull, their flocks
could be decimated. No longer would they grace my decks with
such regularity, thus, I rely on Afloat readers to deal with any
Cremorne Point, NSW.
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